Last week I was listening to an Coaching For Leaders podcast when Stephen M. R. Covey was the guest. Stephen is a bestselling author and former CEO Covey Leadership Center.
Stephen is also the son of Dr. Stephen R. Covey’s, author of the well known 7 habits of highly effective people book. When asked about a key lesson from his father, Stephen talks about the evolution from dependence to independence to interdependence. Having never read the book, I though it would a good idea to
a) Put the book on my reading list.
b) Already dive in a little bit more into this topic.
What did I learn?
The basic idea is that personal and professional growth can be seen as a journey through three stages: dependence, independence, and interdependence. Each stage represents a significant transformation in how we relate to ourselves, others, and the world.
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Dependence: The starting point
Dependence is where we all begin. As children, we rely on our parents to meet our basic needs and guide our decisions. In the professional world, dependence can be seen in those who require constant supervision or direction. At this stage, we look to others for approval, solutions, and validation.
This doesn’t mean that dependence is something bad—it’s a natural phase of learning and development. However, staying in this phase too long can stifle growth and create unhealthy dynamics, such as a lack of accountability or over-reliance on authority figures.
Independence: The empowerment phase
The next stage, independence, is often celebrated as the hallmark of success. Independence is characterized by self-reliance, the ability to make decisions, and the confidence to act without needing constant guidance. It’s the phase where we take ownership of our lives and careers.
In the workplace, independence is evident in employees who manage their tasks effectively, take initiative, and solve problems autonomously. It is also the stage where leaders empower themselves to step away from micromanagement and trust their teams to deliver.
However, independence has its limitations. While it fosters self-sufficiency, it can lead to isolation or a lack of collaboration. Highly independent individuals may struggle to delegate, collaborate, or leverage the strengths of others.
Interdependence: The ultimate goal
The final stage, interdependence, is where the real magic happens. Interdependence recognizes that no one succeeds in isolation and that collaboration creates exponential value.
It’s not about losing your independence—it’s about combining your strengths with others to achieve something greater.
In personal growth, interdependence means forming meaningful relationships where support flows both ways. In professional settings, it translates to high-performing teams that trust each other, communicate effectively, and share responsibility for outcomes.
Interdependence is the cornerstone of thriving organizations. It’s seen in cross-functional collaboration, shared leadership models, and cultures that prioritize collective success over individual glory.
My takeaway
The key to growth, both personally and professionally, lies in mastering interdependence. As a leader, it’s essential to embody both tenacity and humility—the tenacity to lead as you were once led and the humility to serve as you were once served. While independence often develops naturally, interdependence demands deliberate effort, insight, courage, and humility. Independence can drive change, but only interdependence can drive true transformation.